Tag Archive for: goal setting

The biggest temptation in life is to settle for too littleThomas Merton

Are you moving through life without a clear direction? Are you letting events and other people’s needs take priority over what you want to do?  Do you have a plan, or are your days being filled with ‘doing’ rather than ‘being’?

Is Life Passing You By?

Twelve months ago, I found myself complaining that ‘life seemed to be passing me by!’  I was bored, frustrated and totally unfulfilled!  I’d had a health scare which had been a big wake-up call and suddenly I was looking at life differently.

I would wake up in the morning and my calendar would be fill.  It was filled with:  picking kids up from school, banking, shopping, doing this and doing that… but none of it was my plan.  My husband would tell me to ‘take the day off and do something just for me!’  But, that was my biggest problem!  I had spent so long working and doing for others, helping, solving problems and ‘just being there’ for everyone else, I had forgotten what I enjoyed doing!   Can you relate to that?

Plan for Your Life

As a coach I knew that your best chance of having the life that you want is to know precisely where you are going. This applies to every area of your life: your health, finances, social life and anything else that is important to you.  Some of us plan this intuitively but very few of us sit down and really plan it and have a clear idea of exactly where we want to go.

Most of us will spend more time on planning a holiday than we will on planning our lives and where we want to be in 5 years’ time.    We may have paying our home off planned, but that is called mortgage repayments!   We may have our Superannuation planned, but that is compulsory planning via the Government program!  I know many small business owners who have never contributed on their own behalf into their Superannuation.  There are other areas like career, education, having children, where most of us don’t plan what we want and where we want to be at different times in our lives, we just keep hoping that over time we will ‘get a lucky break’ and things will be ‘sweet!’

When we do not spend time on planning our lives we are like a yacht without a rudder, we have little control, and we pretty much must go where the wind blows.  We are at the mercy of the elements, other people, circumstances etc. Goals Dream & Achieve

Do You Know What You Want?

Many people are doing things they have to do in their lives because they have no choice, they live lives of quiet desperation. They know what they don’t want but have no clue what they do want.   This is where I was.

Deep down, we know what we would love to do, but often we can’t see a way that its possible, so we push the thought into the background, trying to hide the idea even from ourselves.   We disregard our most inspiring dreams and goals and settle for whatever seems reasonable or whatever comes our way.

This is the position I found myself in 12 months ago.  My lack of planning was in the ‘spiritual’ area of my life!   What makes my heart sing?

When you are doing what you love and have a plan of how you are going to do it, you never need motivation or inspiration.  You can’t wait to get out of bed in the morning and you live a life of purpose.

To get myself back on track, I sat down and asked myself the following questions?  I encourage you to do the same, in each of the 7 areas of your life – Spiritual, Career, Finances, Social, Health, Family, Vocation –  take some time by yourself to ask yourself the following:

  1. What do you want?
  2. Why do you want it?

Notice I have not said ‘how you are going to get it’  Once you are crystal clear on what you want and why you want it,  the how’s will appear.  The ‘how’ is the easy part!

It took me a couple of months to figure what I really wanted to be doing… but now on I am on track!  Here’s a little clue to where to start looking….. ‘When I was a teenager, I wanted to travel and show people the world – most of my life I have been a ‘coach’  …. Now, I am running Life Change Retreats and Journeys’  I have combined my two passions into my dream job!  It is what I was born to do!

Success verses Self-Sabotage

Being successful is something that we all strive to achieve.  Almost from birth, we are measured on how quickly we achieve the standard ‘benchmarks’ of development.  We start school and our success is marked on our report card and determined by academic achievement.  While our minds are focused on the pursuit of success, we are never really taught to deal with the potential obstacles that stand in between us and our goals. It’s strange, isn’t it?  On one hand, we are taught to focus our time chasing success. But, on the other hand, we do not always ask ourselves what it is that keeps us from ever accomplishing it.  As a result, we are confronted with the same issues repeatedly.

So, why does this happen?

These self-sabotaging habits of ours are locked into our sub-conscious mind and triggered off by the same or similar events happening.  What does this mean?Sabotage Success

Between conception and 7 years of age, we absorb everything that happens around, almost as a sponge soaks up water!  We have no filters and all of this is ‘stored’ as being ‘true for us’!  These thoughts form the basis of our attitude and identity and influences how we ‘expect’ life to play out.

You may have noticed that, mostly, we spend more time thinking and complaining about things that we feel dis-advantage us, or we think are bad, unfair or did not quite turn out as we expected them to.   Add to this, the news is constantly bombarding us with negatives. The old saying of ‘no news is good news’ started out as a reassuring comment to ‘not worry if you hear nothing from a person.’  But now it is an actual truth.  Good news is not ‘news worthy’.  Bad news is more interesting. Bad news, horrifying news engages people quicker and keeps them engaged while the drama unfolds.  For myself, I find that often my conversations veer towards the negatives of a situation. I also find that even a small negative can negate the positives of even an exciting experience.

One Lousy Hotel

Just recently I returned home from a trip to Sri Lanka with a group of people.  The trip was great, lots of great experiences and excursions, but the last hotel we stayed in was well below par.  While waiting for our flight home, it was this ‘lousy’ hotel that dominated the conversation for many of the group and, in doing so over-rode the memories of all the good fun and other good hotels that we stayed in.

Stinking Thinking

But our sabotages and, as I call it, ‘stinking thinking’ does not always concern negativity.  Often, our long-term habits prevent us from achieving our goals, cause us to procrastinate or simply give up on project.  This ‘stinking thinking’ is when the little voice in our head is saying things like ‘I’m not good enough’ ‘who do I think I am’, ‘I’m not smart enough’ and similar that undermines our confidence and self-esteem.   To change ‘stinking thinking’, you must first discover where it came from and what is the underlying cause.  Hypnosis is the quickest way to do this.

At Transformations Coaching and Hypnotherapy we work with clients every week to change the negative ‘stinking thinking’ habits that are sabotaging results for our clients.

Retreat – Workshops with Attitude

Now we have taken this a step further with the expansion of our business to include Life Change Retreats & Journeys.  The first of our Life Change Retreats – Transform You is being held in Ubud, Bali from 23rd to 29th March 2019.

Imagine:  7 days in spectacular Bali… 7 days to press pause and focus ‘just on you!’

We would love to have you join us …. So for more info:  www.LifeChangeRetreats.com.au/transform-you-retreat